#10: Hear, hear!

President Plane Crash Strikes Again

A small aircraft crashed into a residential neighborhood in Simi Valley, Southern California, on Saturday afternoon, killing the sole occupant and damaging two homes.

White House Posts Trumpf as Star Wars Villain Wielding Red Light Saber

The WH posted the following message:

"Happy May the 4th to all, including the Radical Left Lunatics who are fighting so hard to to bring Sith Lords, Murderers, Drug Lords, Dangerous Prisoners, & well known MS-13 Gang Members, back into our Galaxy. You're not the Rebellion, you're the Empire. May the 4th be with you."

Retired FBI Agent Says Kash Patel Partying More Than Working

Former assistant director of the FBI, Frank Figliuzzi, levied a wild accusation about Kash Patel, claiming that the current FBI boss spends more time out clubbing than he does at work.

'Reportedly, he's been visible at nightclubs far more than he has been on the seventh floor of the Hoover building.'

Figliuzzi was the assistant director for counterintelligence at the FBI after serving as a special agent for 25 years.

His connections at the FBI revealed the chaos under Patel, including his party animal persona.

'And there are reports that daily briefings to him have been changed from every day to maybe twice weekly,' he added.

Figliuzzi explained that Patel's absence is a 'blessing and a curse,' due to his lack of experience in the field.

Former National Security Advisor Mike Waltz Caught Using App Even Less Secure Than Signal

"The version of Signal that recently ousted national security adviser Mike Waltz was caught checking during a Cabinet meeting is an unofficial edition of the app meant to archive messages. The archiving capability suggests that the app may not use end-to-end encryption, making it less secure than the standard version of Signal."

"There is a visible message at the bottom of Waltz's screen asking him to verify his "TM SGNL PIN." This is different from the standard version of Signal, where this notification just reads "Verify your Signal PIN." Not only was Waltz using a private, insecure platform to discuss highly sensitive information, he was using the least secure version of that platform to do so. "TM SGNL" refers to a program from software company TeleMessage that captures and stores Signal messages for the user.