The Onion Investigates: Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile

If you are easily offended by political satire willing to take on any subject, then I suggest you.... still watch. You might get over yourself.

For me, I think I may sue The Onion, (as will a lot of other people!); they named Epstein's Island Cockatiel, "Corky"!

But at least I know where he ran, er, flew away to.

(Tell us some of your favorite lines from the video. Yes, there is a Transcript.)

#1 | Posted by Corky at 2025-10-10 08:20 PM | Reply

Michael Wolff Says Epstein Showed Him Photos of Trump With Topless Girls at His House
www.thenorthstar.com

... Two topless girls on Trump's lap. One photo with a stain on his pants. Epstein kept these in his safe -- and showed them off. This wasn't just perversion. This was blackmail. ...

#2 | Posted by LampLighter at 2025-10-10 08:37 PM | Reply

The curious aspect of this is that AG Bondi did not reply with a simple "no" when she was asked by RI Sen Whitehouse regarding she knew of these photos.

OpEd: Photographer Captures Pam Bondi's Notes"and They're a Doozy
www.yahoo.com

... U.S. Attorney General Pam Bondi needed a cheat sheet of attacks to dodge Senator Sheldon Whitehouse's tough questions.

While sitting before the Senate Judiciary Committee Tuesday, Bondi repeatedly refused to answer questions from the Rhode Island Democrat about what happened to the $50,000 cash bribe border czar Tom Homan received from undercover FBI agents in 2024.

Reuters photographer Jonathan Ernst captured an image of the inside of a folder of notes Bondi referred to during questioning by Whitehouse. But her notes had nothing to do with her work as leader of the Department of Justice, or even the embattled border czar. Rather, Bondi had collected screenshots of social media posts, prewritten comebacks, and handwritten notes she hoped could give her a good "gotcha" moment.

The top of the folder showed a July X post from Whitehouse in which he'd called for an investigation into Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas. "No government official should be above the law," he wrote.

Also included in the folder was a bulleted list of comebacks. Apparently, Bondi needed to prepare the remark "You are a total hypocrite" in advance. ...

#3 | Posted by LampLighter at 2025-10-10 08:40 PM | Reply

Wolff was Epstein's biographer and was working on Trump's bio... he knows where a lot of the bodies are hidden, and is frequently on the Daily Beast's show.

Here he is talking Yesterday about the story in the link in #2:

I've Seen Epstein Pics of Trump With Topless Girls: Michael Wolff | Inside Trump's Head

The Daily Beast

www.youtube.com

Of course, he's talking reality, not satire.

#4 | Posted by Corky at 2025-10-10 08:45 PM | Reply

@#4 ... Of course, he's talking reality ...

There are times when The Onion's satire provokes the basis for a non satirical discussion.

imo, this thread may be one of those times?

#5 | Posted by LampLighter at 2025-10-10 08:49 PM | Reply

Both will be nice.... no worries.

#6 | Posted by Corky at 2025-10-10 08:52 PM | Reply

Fox News America Reports Show, Feb 21, 2025

Host: This is something Donald Trump has talked about. The DoJ may be releasing the list of Jeffrey Epstein's clients? Will that really happen?

AG Bondi: It's sitting on my desk right now to review. That's been a directive by Pres Trump.

www.npr.org

...Feb. 21: Attorney General Pam Bondi says the Epstein client list is "sitting on my desk" in an appearance on Fox News, in response to a question from John Roberts.

#7 | Posted by LampLighter at 2025-10-10 09:37 PM | Reply

@#4 ... Of course, he's talking reality, not satire. ...

Yup.

#8 | Posted by LampLighter at 2025-10-10 11:13 PM | Reply