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Drudge Retort: The Other Side of the News
Monday, March 31, 2025

The New York Yankees opened the 2025 season by hitting a record 15 home runs in their first three games. Nine were hit by players using a new bat design dubbed the bowling pin or torpedo bat. "This bat is just trying to say: What if we put the mass where the ball is going to hit so that we have an optimized equation of mass and velocity?" said bat whisperer Scott Drake.

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Science? AN OUTRAGE! Burn them at the stake!!

#1 | Posted by LegallyYourDead at 2025-03-31 09:00 PM | Reply

It took decades for the DH to be universally accepted in baseball. All MLB batters will be using this bat by the All-Star break this year. Of course, no one is talking about the crappy pitching that the Yanks faced over the weekend. I'm sure that the slo-pitch rotation the Bombers faced had NOTHING to do with their feast of dingers...

#2 | Posted by catdog at 2025-04-01 08:27 AM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

I haven't paid attention to baseball in years, but if more of the weight of these bats is higher up the barrel that probably would translate into more torque of the joints of the arm- especially the wrist and elbow. Using may lead to an increase in elbow and wrist injuries, which I remember during my days as a high schooler in the late 80s trying to learn a split-finger fastball.

#3 | Posted by ExpectingReign at 2025-04-01 11:29 PM | Reply

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