Friday, November 01, 2024

Tucker Carlson Says He Was 'Mauled' by a Demon While Sleeping

Tucker Carlson says he was mauled by a demon in a video that was released on Thursday, which happens to be Halloween.

Posted by reinheitsgebot at 09:31 PM | 19 COMMENTS | permalink

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Comments

A demon. Well I guess that is one explanation.

I guess rough sex with a male hooker while high on an eight ball is another.

#1 | Posted by Nixon at 2024-11-01 08:38 AM

You know...dogs know the true character of a person and will protect the ones they love.

Major protected Biden from the secret service.

#2 | Posted by Nixon at 2024-11-01 08:39 AM

It was probably Laura Loomer.

#3 | Posted by reinheitsgebot at 2024-11-01 08:43 AM

Succubus or incubus?

#4 | Posted by Doc_Sarvis at 2024-11-01 11:14 AM

He should have probably just paid her instead of trying to negotiate the price.

#5 | Posted by donnerboy at 2024-11-01 01:12 PM

Smart dogs.

They scratch Tucker, he thinks it's, 'demons'.

"Good boy!"

#6 | Posted by Corky at 2024-11-01 01:26 PM

It was probably Laura Loomer.

#3 | Posted by reinheitsgebot

I vote for this as funniest comment of the year. Especially given what Loomer looks like with all the plastic surgery.

#7 | Posted by Sycophant at 2024-11-01 02:43 PM

I blame Christine O'Donnell.

#8 | Posted by sentinel at 2024-11-01 11:14 PM

A demon. Well I guess that is one explanation.

I guess rough sex with a male hooker while high on an eight ball is another.

#1 | Posted by Nixon

It will never cease to disgust me that there are supposed full ass grown adults who believe his obviously false story because they still believe ridiculous Bronze Age goat herder myths.

#9 | Posted by jpw at 2024-11-01 11:50 PM

Gee golly, I can't imagine why an evil demon would be visiting Tucker Carlson. ~ LOL

#10 | Posted by Twinpac at 2024-11-02 01:54 AM

" Gee golly, I can't imagine why an evil demon would be visiting Tucker Carlson. ~ LOL

#10 | POSTED BY TWINPAC AT 2024-11-02 01:54 AM | REPLY | FLAG:"

That is really funny and the timing is perfect. Because it was Halloween I wanted to watch a horror flick last night and chose The Exorcist.

#11 | Posted by BellRinger at 2024-11-02 02:06 AM

Tucker who? Who cares.

#12 | Posted by AlternateFacts at 2024-11-02 08:20 AM

He's an entertainer, not a journalist. Anyone who takes anything he says seriously is seriously deluded.

#13 | Posted by johnny_hotsauce at 2024-11-02 10:02 AM

Sounds like a classic case of cannibalism to me.

#14 | Posted by Yodagirl at 2024-11-02 03:40 PM

That wasn't a demon I got done banging his mom and was feeling a little bored so I went into his room and punched him till Tucker wet his pants and then went back to her room.

#15 | Posted by Tor at 2024-11-02 03:49 PM

Can someone confirm where Yav was that night?

#16 | Posted by deadman at 2024-11-02 10:03 PM

Your mom was turning tricks on the interstate like always.

You stupid ------- ----.

#17 | Posted by LegallyYourDead at 2024-11-02 11:12 PM

"Your mom was turning tricks on the interstate like always.
#17 | Posted by LegallyYourDead"

So she could not have been the one that mauled Tucker by your own logic. So, I ask again - does anyone know where Yav was that night?

#18 | Posted by deadman at 2024-11-03 12:03 AM

Sounds like this supposedly took place around the time Fox spun on a dime, canned Carlson and he went into a tailspin. The Salem Explanation makes Tuckums, by his own logic, a very bad girl in need of a spanking. What a douche.

#19 | Posted by Doc_Sarvis at 2024-11-03 06:53 AM

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