Drudge Retort: The Other Side of the News
Friday, September 05, 2025

The two teens arrested in an attempted carjacking that left former DOGE-bag Edward Coristine (AKA "Big Balls") beaten to a pulp in Washington DC, have now been slapped with assault and robbery charges. Their confrontation with Edward Coristine served as the excuse for Dummkopf Trumpf's fascist occupation of the nation's capital. The judge ordered the female (15) to be released from a youth gulag and into the custody of her caretakers on a strict 24-hour curfew. The male (15) is already at home with his parents after being released. The suspects have not been identified because of their age.

  • No doubt the incompetent sot AUSA Jeanine "Hic!" Pirro would seek the death penalty for the two juveniles if she could.
  • "We just almost lost a young man, beautiful handsome guy that got the hell knocked out of him," the pedophilic President bellyached.

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    No GoFundMe webpage has yet been located to pay for the defendant's legal fees. Who knows how much data and money "Big Balls" Edward Coristine pilfered from the American taxpayer while cutting critical jobs at NWS, DoE, NHS, etc? The damage DOGE to the US is almost incalculable. Now this parasite is enjoying a handsome GG-15 salary at the SSA. If we're all lucky, this sinister Felon Musk DOGE-bag will get beat up every year or two. Wouldn't that make for pleasant news?
    https://nypost.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2025/08/076521504d14e9d2_c8ab9b.jpg?quality=75&strip=all

    Comments

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    BWAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

    DOGE FAG GOT THE SHIT BEAT OUT HIM

    #1 | Posted by LegallyYourDead at 2025-09-05 03:17 PM | Reply

    Yes, I too was heartbroken to read this snot-nosed elitist blood-sucker got tuned up by elements from the less privileged strata.

    I guess "Big Balls" was trying to impress his date with his wads of money, fancy car, and formidable fighting skills: media.istockphoto.com

    #2 | Posted by C0RI0LANUS at 2025-09-05 03:45 PM | Reply

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