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Drudge Retort: The Other Side of the News
Monday, February 05, 2024

Buckingham Palace: During The King's recent hospital procedure for benign prostate enlargement, a separate issue of concern was noted. Subsequent diagnostic tests have identified a form of cancer. His Majesty has today commenced a schedule of regular treatments, during which time he has been advised by doctors to postpone public-facing duties. Throughout this period, His Majesty will continue to undertake State business and official paperwork as usual. The King is grateful to his medical team for their swift intervention, which was made possible thanks to his recent hospital procedure. He remains wholly positive about his treatment and looks forward to returning to full public duty as soon as possible. His Majesty has chosen to share his diagnosis to prevent speculation and in the hope it may assist public understanding for all those around the world who are affected by cancer.

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Admin's note: Participants in this discussion must follow the site's moderation policy. Profanity will be filtered. Abusive conduct is not allowed.

Ha Ha! - Nelson

#1 | Posted by moder8 at 2024-02-05 03:08 PM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

He waited his entire life to be king.

Now he's got cancer?

Silver lining, he'll receive the best medical care possible.

#2 | Posted by ClownShack at 2024-02-05 03:14 PM | Reply

Cancer is a Real B...
wouldn't wish it upon anyone.

except maybe Hitler,
or Trump,
or Mitch McConnell.

and then there is Dick Cheney.

But other then that...

(lol. just joking).

Cancer blows.

#3 | Posted by earthmuse at 2024-02-05 03:15 PM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

Who?

#4 | Posted by JOE at 2024-02-05 03:16 PM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

Who?

#4 | Posted by JOE

Some guy with no power or skill who leeches off the state to live in luxury.

#5 | Posted by SpeakSoftly at 2024-02-05 03:42 PM | Reply | Newsworthy 2

And I know what kind of cancer it is.

King Cancer!

(Lord forgive me and bless the Rampasasa pygmies in Indonesia.)

#6 | Posted by donnerboy at 2024-02-05 03:59 PM | Reply | Funny: 1

And I know what kind of cancer it is.

King Cancer!

Do you have any bone in you labeled "compassion"?

#7 | Posted by Monkeybars at 2024-02-05 04:24 PM | Reply | Funny: 2

I thought he was drinking babies' blood to live forever? Or just his ma? Let me check QAnon real quick...

#8 | Posted by hamburglar at 2024-02-05 04:27 PM | Reply | Funny: 1

Do you have any bone in you labeled "compassion"?

#7 | POSTED BY MONKEYBARS

Nope I checked.

No bones called "compassion".

But I do have one called a "funny" bone.

Et tu?

#9 | Posted by donnerboy at 2024-02-05 05:00 PM | Reply | Newsworthy 2

Sounds like radiation treatments. If so, side effects will be like a bad urinary infection and he will have to stay close to the Royal Loo.

#10 | Posted by TenMile at 2024-02-05 06:30 PM | Reply | Funny: 1

After a long reigning monarch, the next monarch tends to have a very short reign. That's why a great sovereign is usually followed not by a great child but a great grandchild.

#11 | Posted by s1l3ntc0y0t3 at 2024-02-05 09:50 PM | Reply

The question is not whether Chuckie deserves cancer. The question is whether cancer deserves Chuckie.

Monarchs are parasites.

#12 | Posted by DarkVader at 2024-02-06 12:20 PM | Reply

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