Intense Manhunt at White House for Leaker

Thursday, July 16, 2026

White House Chief of Staff Susie Wiles and D/FBI Kashyap Pramod Vinod Patel established a hasty war room in the West Wing lasting seven hours to feverishly determine who leaked information about the security deficiencies on the Qatari-gifted airplane meant to be used as Air Force One. D/FBI Patel was diverted at the last minute from a trip to Chicago and some officials were asked to turn over their phones to investigators on White House grounds.

"Bribe Force One" is a disaster

Posted by C0RI0LANUS at 01:14 AM | 8 COMMENTS | permalink | Comment on This Entry |

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D/FBI Kashyap Pramod Vinod Patel, the most incompetent FBI Director in inter-stellar history, personally led the hunt for the White House leakers.

#1 | Posted by C0RI0LANUS at 2026-07-16 01:14 AM | Reply

Does this indiscreetly loquacious leaker's surname happen to be five letters long, starting with a "T" and ending with a "P"?

#2 | Posted by Doc_Sarvis at 2026-07-16 05:04 AM | Reply

When the shooting occured at the White House Press Corps Dinner earlier this year, Kashyap "I'll Have The Vindaloo Chicken" Patel was caught on video wandering around outside the hotel like a bewildered by-stander, eyes all agog and wits nowhere to be found.

Did anyone catch what planet Kashyap said he was from?

Maybe RedLightRobot's heliograph might offer us all a clue.

#3 | Posted by C0RI0LANUS at 2026-07-16 07:13 AM | Reply

My guess is it's the same person who vandalized the reflecting pool.

#4 | Posted by NerfHerder at 2026-07-16 11:51 AM | Reply

Re 2

The leaker is wearing Depends.

#5 | Posted by donnerboy at 2026-07-16 12:10 PM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

Obviously it's Treason! for the People to know that DJT was duped and clowned yet again.

#6 | Posted by Corky at 2026-07-16 12:13 PM | Reply

Re 1

Better check that guys testosterone levels

Chronic heavy drinking is directly linked to low testosterone!

Alcohol acts as a testicular toxin and disrupts the hormonal pathway between the brain and the testes. Which explains how your dick starts thinking for you when you are drunk!

For many men with chronic alcohol use disorder, testosterone can drop by 50 to 75 percent!

Get that man tested stat!!

#7 | Posted by donnerboy at 2026-07-16 12:13 PM | Reply

Re 6

It is is now a crime to investigate any of Trumpy's crimes.

#8 | Posted by donnerboy at 2026-07-16 12:16 PM | Reply