Fools - Life Sucks Then You Die (1985)
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Lyrics excerpt (and then some) ...
genius.com

... Wicked Local once wrote that "Life Sucks, Then You Die" is a single that "totally trashes the traditional country-western song."

It flew off the shelves in New England in 1985 faster than their new record company could get it printed and was popular on Dr. Demento's national radio show. ...

My house burned down in a flash of thunder
My wife ran off with a one-legged plumber
My crops fell dead when the riverbed went dry
My dog got squashed by a pickup truck
My son ran away and got hooked on drugs
My daughter's knocked up by the class of '85

People say that life is good
It don't seem good to me
I'm lost without a paddle
And I'm headed up ---- creek
People say that life is fun
But I don't know why
As far as I can tell
Life sucks then you die

The government dumps its toxic waste
Right on top of my mother's grave
A team of experts say it won't do her no harm
But my sheep went crazy and killed my mule
I cut off my dick with a power tool
Fixin' the hole where the meteor hit the barn
And it hurt, too!

People say that life is good
But I just piss and moan
I got one foot on a banana peel
The other in the Twilight Zone
People say that life is fun
But I don't know why
As far as I can tell
Life sucks then you die
...