Drudge Retort: The Other Side of the News
Wednesday, August 26, 2026

Using the bathroom or having a cry is about to become more expensive for North Americans as the US and Canada enter a full-fledged trade war that threatens to flush away decades of peaceful trading between the two nations.

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Oh sh t!

#1 | Posted by qcp at 2026-08-26 01:30 PM | Reply | Funny: 1

Yes, but what if the cost of Depends? I'm sure our taxpayer dollars are funding Pedo Donnie's ---- rags.

#2 | Posted by LegallyYourDead at 2026-08-26 03:32 PM | Reply | Funny: 1

They should use lettuce. American tp has wood chips.

#3 | Posted by Jaspar at 2026-08-26 04:44 PM | Reply

Hey - beats corn cobs...

#4 | Posted by South_American at 2026-08-26 10:51 PM | Reply

I remember the lesson I learned from last toilet paper stampede to stock up while you can. If we know our Donald, it's going to get worse.

BTW, in case no one has noticed, he's looking more and more like one of those comic book villain every day.

#5 | Posted by Twinpac at 2026-08-27 01:11 AM | Reply

Toilet paper has wood chips.

Who else but Lex Luthor would think of combining toilet paper and the destruction of America's National Forests to force people to his will?

#6 | Posted by Twinpac at 2026-08-27 01:23 AM | Reply

I remember the lesson I learned from last toilet paper stampede

That people are stupid?

#7 | Posted by REDIAL at 2026-08-27 01:25 AM | Reply

REDIAL

It's been a while, but I seem to recall that stupidity didn't play any part in the last "toilet paper stampede." It was because gas prices practically called a halt to vacation traveling in the U.S. and the toilet paper industry was caught flat footed when hotels and motels cut their orders to the bone, leaving the industry with warehouses overstocked to the rafters with hotel/motel product and no room to stock the over demand from retail stores.

I witnessed it myself at Walmarts. Eventually the store had to put a guard on what little toilet paper they had on the shelves, limiting one 6-pack per customer. Prior to that, people in the front of the stampede were throwing packs of toilet paper to those in the back. Families were showing up, including children, each one with a cart, to get more than their share. It was the same at retail stores everywhere. It made the evening news.

None of these people were stupid. They were panic stricken.

There was a rumor (LOL) that Monkey-Ward catalogs went pack into production.

#8 | Posted by Twinpac at 2026-08-27 02:06 AM | Reply

oopsie . . . ."pack" = back.

#9 | Posted by Twinpac at 2026-08-27 02:54 AM | Reply

MAGA looked at Trump and the women he ran against, and they said...hell no, we won't be allowing no woman to be boss...
And so, the idiocracy, for at least a couple of months, or perhaps for two years.
Imagine decent people, imagine there actually being a heaven, imagine Jimmy Carter looking down and weeping for his country.

#10 | Posted by Hughmass at 2026-08-27 06:58 AM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

HUGH

Speaking of Trump's pet females . . .

Natalie Harp seems to have crossed the Rubicon and survived . . so far. At least according to the love notes we've been seeing.

What's your take on that?

#11 | Posted by Twinpac at 2026-08-27 08:15 AM | Reply

"What's your take on that?"

Some women are perfectly willing to give away their souls to men perfectly willing to take them.

#12 | Posted by pumpkinhead at 2026-08-27 09:14 AM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

This is not a big problem for those who wear adult diapers. Right, Dotard?

#13 | Posted by catdog at 2026-08-27 09:34 AM | Reply

Oh, my aching axx...

#14 | Posted by Yodagirl at 2026-08-27 05:59 PM | Reply

PUMPKIN

"Some women are perfectly willing to give away their souls to men perfectly willing to take them."

Melania could probably give a clinic on that subject.

#15 | Posted by Twinpac at 2026-08-27 09:09 PM | Reply

@#15

Possibly, but First Lady Trump seems to be putting a new shape on her relationship with Pres trump.

Why would Pres Trump seem to want a lock on his bedroom door?

To keep First Lady Trump out of the bedroom?


#16 | Posted by LampLighter at 2026-08-27 09:20 PM | Reply

LAMP

"To keep First Lady Trump out of the bedroom?

LOL ~ And here all this time we thought it was the other way around.

#17 | Posted by Twinpac at 2026-08-27 10:06 PM | Reply

@#17 ... LOL ...

Yeah, that was my first thought on this.

But I also see things like this ...

One of Donald Trump's Pals Claims He Had a Confrontation' With the Secret Service About His Sleeping Habits
www.sheknows.com

... Sleeping arrangements are different for everybody. Some like the fan on for white noise, while others like to listen to ASMR to drift off to sleep. Some people have the lights on, some have them off; you get it, it's all about preferences. Apparently, though, a couple of US President Donald Trump's sleeping habits caused a confrontation with his staff, per one of his close acquaintances.

In case you missed it, biographer Michael Wolff spoke on a new Inside Trump's Head podcast episode, specifically about Trump's bedtime habits; and how they had to be put to an end.

"During the first administration, he had a lock installed on his bedroom door, and that precipitated a fight with the Secret Service, who actually took it off " demanded it be taken off. This was a confrontation," he said. ...

Sleeping arrangements are different for everybody. Some like the fan on for white noise, while others like to listen to ASMR to drift off to sleep. Some people have the lights on, some have them off; you get it, it's all about preferences. Apparently, though, a couple of US President Donald Trump's sleeping habits caused a confrontation with his staff, per one of his close acquaintances.

In case you missed it, biographer Michael Wolff spoke on a new Inside Trump's Head podcast episode, specifically about Trump's bedtime habits; and how they had to be put to an end.
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"During the first administration, he had a lock installed on his bedroom door, and that precipitated a fight with the Secret Service, who actually took it off " demanded it be taken off. This was a confrontation," he said.
First Lady Melania Trump, President Donald Trump
Clint Spaulding/WWD/PMC

You may be wondering: Why could no locks be installed? Well, according to The Week, the US President isn't allowed to do so because their armed guards need easier access to them. Plus, the armed guard is always out front, and having to go through a locked door could be a security risk.

Now, this actually isn't the first time we've heard about this bedroom habit. Back in 2019, in Free, Melania: the Unauthorized Biography, it was revealed that Donald originally asked for a lock on his door back then, too.

But then, Wolff also discussed a second altercation with the White House staff, saying, "Then there was another issue when the White House domestic staff changed his sheets, and he had a fit. What that's about, I have no idea." And neither do we! ...



#18 | Posted by LampLighter at 2026-08-27 10:25 PM | Reply

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