Trump Says He Would Have Won Vietnam War in a Week, Mixes Up Cities

Monday, November 02, 2026

President Donald Trump said he could have won the Vietnam War in a week, but appeared to mix up cities central to the conflict.

Posted by reinheitsgebot at 01:30 PM | 11 COMMENTS | permalink | Comment on This Entry |

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Trump: "I could've won the Vietnam War in a week" (It's been 8 months and Trump can't defeat Iran)

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-- Aaron Rupar (@atrupar.com) 6:10 PM Â· Nov 1, 2026

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The malodorous, child-raping orange gash who cowers in food carts could've won the Vietnam war in a week? Lol

#1 | Posted by reinheitsgebot at 2026-11-02 10:32 AM | Reply

Of course he'd have tried to bomb Saigon. Fyucking idiot.

#2 | Posted by qcp at 2026-11-02 10:42 AM | Reply

"I would have won that war in one week."

Soon to be..

"It was a rigged war. In fact, We WON that war!"

#3 | Posted by donnerboy at 2026-11-02 11:00 AM | Reply

The same war he draft dodged by having bone spurs.
Now he says he would have won it.
So why'd he draft dodge it?

DR Veterans who voted for Trump know why he dodged the draft.
Because he's better than them.

#4 | Posted by snoofy at 2026-11-02 11:08 AM | Reply

Video of Trump winning the Vietnam War:

www.youtube.com

#5 | Posted by NerfHerder at 2026-11-02 11:57 AM | Reply

"I would have won that war in one week."

via GIPHY

#6 | Posted by Nixon at 2026-11-02 01:05 PM | Reply

He can't win the war he started in Iran.

But sure. Vietnam would have been a cake walk.

#7 | Posted by ClownShack at 2026-11-02 01:16 PM | Reply

Trump often lays claim to uncanny powers to render the maddeningly complex comically simple.
If you think that makes him a simpleton, what about his marks?.

#8 | Posted by Doc_Sarvis at 2026-11-02 01:32 PM | Reply

This is why he always gets the WWE vote. It's not about the content; it's about the performance.

#9 | Posted by sentinel at 2026-11-02 01:41 PM | Reply

Trump Says He Would Have Won Vietnam War in a Week, Mixes Up Cities

Then why didn't he summon up his (self-professed) magical juju and win in Iran in a week or two?

The Emperor Has No Clothes

#10 | Posted by AMERICANUNITY at 2026-11-02 01:41 PM | Reply

Had Trump been President he would have been so enamored with Ho Chi Minh's glutes that the US would have sided with the North.

#11 | Posted by johnny_hotsauce at 2026-11-02 01:53 PM | Reply